Hi everybody! It's Furby! My wonderful Godfather Michael has given me my very own column. Little does he know I'm going to spend a LOT of my time here helping cats dominate their human critters. Won't that be FUN, my feline comrades?
Oh, I'm out for myself too. I want to be famous so I can have catnip parties every weekend and invite all of my cat friends. I'm a good host. If any of my cat guests are too tired to prowl back home they can sleep here. Just be careful fellow cause that's how I got my second wife.
Did I mention we'll be having fresh nip and not that old dried up stuff.
It was all a BIG misunderstanding. Sissy Laura told mama I needed more 9Lives (I LOVE the dry) and I thought sissy said I need 9 WIVES! I'll get into that story later on. Now I want to talk about cat world domination!
First of all, I have a Facebook page under Furby the Feral Feline. PLEASE go there and LIKE my page. Mama has put a really stupid looking picture of me on that page and reuses to take it down until I have 5000 people LIKE me. She sneakerdoodled me on that photo. I was on catnip when she look it and I admit I look a little-well-UNcat-like.
I have several plans in the works, and I'd suggest fellow cats who want to achieve cat world domination do as I do. First get a Facebook page. Geez, Facebook would be empty if it took all the cats and the dog and rabbit critters off of it. Also get a Dogster or Catster page and make as many friends as you can. I'm not sure if there's a Rabbitster or not. Teeheehee.
Check out my private site at http://furbythecat.shutterfly.com. Mama sneakerdoodled me on a few pages there. Everybody is free to check out the pages there, just DON'T, I repeat DON'T look at the Imikimi page. How embarrassing. I must really have been on the catnip when that happened because I don't remember dressing up in ANY of those outfits! I AM sending out invites to that page so please don't call the SPAM police on me!
My BIG dream is to get on the Ellen show. She's this famous talk show host who hands out money like it was candy and cat food like-well let's just say it would feed mama's rescue for a YEAR! THAT is my biggest goal and I hope everybody will help me get there.
So this is a personal invitation for Ellen DeGeneres, owner of Halo pet food, to show up at my door with money, catnip and food. Hi Ellen! LOVE YOU!
As for today, my cat friends and human critters, please LIKE me on FACEBOOK so mama will take down that awful picture of me. I'd hate for a famous talk show how to see it. I look kinda deranged. What ya'll think?
P.S. And to the person I sent this to using the wrong email address-figure this one out yourself!!